A fish out of water

I had fully intended to post again before now. Unfortunately, Thursday night my blood pressure spiked and I landed in the hospital on magnesium sulfate (note to self: if ever on a visit to hell, take devil to task for invention of mag sulf).

I had my youngest 2 babies at home. Birth research has been my life for the past decade. Going to the hospital was not an enjoyable experience, either for many of the staff, or for me. It is where I needed to be at that time, because when problems arise, that's when medical care comes in handy, however it was very disheartening to witness again and again the illogical things that supposedly "educated" medical professionals do and say.

It was also frightening, as I constantly had to be on guard. I had to make considerable efforts in the middle of the night to convince the nurse that something was very wrong - they had the mag sulf too high, I reacted to it, and my BP plummeted, nearly causing me to lose consciousness. They would not believe me at first; I guess when they realized I couldn't articulate a sentence clearly enough for them to interpret, and my legs produced no reflexes, gee, maybe something really is wrong. They turned the mag down and magically I started to get better. If I'd been able to sleep at all, they might never have known anything was wrong and who knows what would have happened.

I was released on Friday night, by a pompous ass of an OB who treated me, well, shall we say, less than respectfully (because I came in as a midwifery client planning a homebirth with a CPM). He sent me home - on the eve of a weekend - with no BP meds and no care plan other than "bedrest" until I can get to the doctor this week, knowing that I have children here at home and bedrest would be a joke. I have had to struggle to keep my BP under control while I wait to make a doctor's appt. tomorrow. I am angry, and complaints will be filed. If I'd been in traditional OB care - i.e. monthly visits - I probably never would have known I was in trouble at that point. It was the close monitoring by my midwife and myself, the every day contact that I have with an excellent care provider, that allowed me to realize I needed to seek out help when I did. He had no right to treat me the way he did.

Vent over.

Now the real adventure begins - figuring out how to navigate a high risk pregnancy while meeting my other responsibilities. If the doctor can fit me in tomorrow, I will find out if I can get on meds, and hopefully have some level of functionality. With 2.5 mths. left to go, this is going to be a long haul, juggling my life as it is, protecting my own health, and getting this little girl safely into her new parents' arms. We're all concerned, and my mind is racing and overwhelmed. Will update tomorrow after I call the doctor's office...